Kevin Pokorny Consulting

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Does compassion at work really matter?

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This is a second blog of sharing my thoughts on the book Awakening Compassion at Work by Monica Worline and Jane Dutton, 2017.  My last blog described compassion at work.

Does compassion at work really matter?  The authors’ research details what they call “the compassion advantage” for any type of organization.  Their premise is that compassion matters more in building high-performing organizations than most people recognize.  They identify six strategic advantages of compassion at work: [Read more…]

Guilt vs. Shame

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In my work with self-compassion, we talk about guilt vs. shame. Both Brene’ Brown, research professor at the University of Houston, and Kristin Neff, Associate Professor of Human Development and Culture at the University of Texas, describe guilt and shame the same way.

  • Guilt – “I feel bad about something I did.”
  • Shame – “I am bad.”

Now, think about the difference between the two.  We can repair guilt when we’ve done something bad, e.g., offended someone.  We can apologize to that person, take responsibility for the hurt we caused, and ask for forgiveness.  As Kristin Neff says, “Research shows that self-compassion allows us to experience our feelings of sadness, regret, and guilt without getting trapped by feelings of shame.” [Read more…]

Words of Wisdom – Part 1

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What follows are words of wisdom from several books I’ve recently read.  May the words offer you wisdom, reflection, and thoughtfulness.

Compassion

“Change brings loss, and loss brings grief, often disguised as anger, fear, anxiety, or resentment.  It seems like we suffer because of change.  [Read more…]

Self-Compassion Questions

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Self-compassion “involves treating yourself the way you would treat a friend who is having a hard time. . .a practice in which we learn to be a good friend to ourselves when we need it most.”  (The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook by Kristen Neff, PhD and Christopher Germer, PhD, 2018)

This past week, I facilitated a self-compassion seminar for bank employees.  I began by asking the participants to reflect on these questions: [Read more…]

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